Her Exhibition Of Bones

Chapter Three

Dylan was having a slow walk on the Andromeda decks, when suddenly, crossing a corner, he bumped into Beka. He reached out and grabbed her shoulders, but was surprised when he noticed they were shaking.

“Fancy running into you here,” he said. Beka gave him a strained grin.

“Ha ha ha,” she said sarcastically. “You’re so hilarious, did you know that.” Dylan nodded, mock seriously.

“Yes,” he said, “would you like to hear some of my jokes?” Beka giggled.

“No thanks,” she said, “I’ve got to keep running.” Dylan sighed.

“Beka, you’re shaking.” She glanced at him and shrugged.

“No, I’m not.” Dylan gave a disbelieving laugh.

“But Beka, I can feel you. You’re shaking.” She pulled away from him, noticeably ashamed.

“I’m not,” she said, raising her voice. “Now can I go, Captain?” Dylan took a step back at her sudden hostility. He nodded slowly, and watched as she ran off.

“Rommie,” he said, “is there anything strange about Beka’s readings?” He didn’t want to say anything but the last time she behaved like this was when…when she took flash. Rommie popped up.

“Physical exhaustion and lack of nutrition. Seems like she’s been using more energy than she’s taken in today.” She sighed. “No Dylan, there are no signs of flash. Don’t worry.” Dylan looked guilty

“I wasn’t thinking that,” he lied. Rommie raised an eyebrow.

“No,” she said. “Of course not.” Dylan smiled at her and kept on walking. How could he have believed she’d be taking flash, just because she was a little edgy? Lack of energy, that would explain it. Her actions had a perfectly normal explanation, she’d eat something and she’d be fine. He shook his head. Maybe he should cut her some slack and stop worrying all the time. After all, what was the worst thing that could happen?

****

Beka stumbled back into the Maru, gasping for breath like she had the other day. It had been four days now since she’d decided to start losing weight and she was quite pleased with her self-discipline. She’d only been having minimal amounts of lettuce and water, and even though she was hungry, the feeling had subsided slowly the longer she resisted it. She sat down on the floor, hitting her shoulder on the wall on the way down.

“Ow,” she sobbed, surprised as she felt tears running down her cheeks. Since when did she get so upset over something so trivial? She banged her fist on the floor, creating more pain.

“Stupid bloody wall,” she cried. The sniffles slowly wore out, and she stumbled up to a mirror, critically studying herself. She’d never felt such a despise for her body before. Well actually, she hadn’t cared before.

“So why do I care now?” she briefly asked herself. She knew the answer. Her body had never been a problem before, because it hadn’t stopped her from doing things right. Until now. It was the same thing as with the flash. She’d tried to make everyone happy, and got herself addicted to the stuff in the process, nearly killing herself. She shook her head.

“That wouldn’t happen now,” she reassured herself. “I’m just losing some weight, not taking drugs.” She shuddered as she looked at herself in the mirror. How could she not have noticed? She took her top off and critically studied herself further. She pulled her stomach in as much as she could and sighed. It didn’t make much difference.

“I can’t go around looking like this,” she thought angrily, “I can’t believe I have this far.” She knew she was exaggerating, but somehow it didn’t matter. She’d gotten herself into something, and she’d be damned if she wasn’t going to succeed. She took out a new top from her drawers, one that she hardly ever wore. It was a big and bulky sweater, not her normal kind of clothing, but it would work for now.

“Until I’ve lost enough weight to look good in tank tops again,” she mumbled to herself, hoping that would be soon. She was already feeling hot in the sweater. She tried a smile at herself in the mirror.

“I can do it,” she reassured herself. “I can do it.” So why was she feeling so afraid?